


C is for Con Non Con: Shatter Me

by JadedWarrior



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Badass Rey, CNC, Dubious Consent, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Forced Orgasm, MMA Fighter Kylo, Modern Era, Prenegotiated Non Consent, References to Depression, Rey Needs A Hug, Rough Fingering, Vaginal Fingering, ben needs a hug, ceo rey, consensual non consent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:01:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26681854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadedWarrior/pseuds/JadedWarrior
Summary: She feels nothing. Maybe it’s burn out, overwhelm, or maybe, she just doesn’t care. But hundreds if not thousands depend on her to keep their jobs, to save the Empire from ruin. And if she tries to shock herself out of this ennui by prenegotiated dubious consent, so what?This fic is inspired by Wanna Let You Take Me Over by Becca Stanz.https://archiveofourown.org/works/24848506CW://Although the dub con is pre-negotiated, the themes in this fic may be triggering. Please read the tags before proceeding and never feel obligated to read anything that is uncomfortable.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 15
Kudos: 43
Collections: House Dadam A-Z Kink Collection





	C is for Con Non Con: Shatter Me

Because she wasn’t a self-destructive moron, she set the first meetbehind Holdos, just off downtown, after dark. Private enough and yet public enough to scream for help if things went south.

He offered to buy dinner first, but if she wanted stilted conversation, she would have allowed Finn to set her up.

_< Ren: Safe word?>_

_< Kira: Red for stop. Mercy for pace change.>_

If Finn knew she took the evening off to drive an hour to Chandrilla for a forced hand-job orgasm, he’d probably have her evaluated and sedated. And honestly, she would have to agree.

_< Kira: I want to re-iterate no spitting/hitting/pain>_

_< Ren: You may still hurt yourself if you strike me.>_

_< Kira: I’m not a novice.>_

_< Ren: Noted>_

She wasn’t sure if he “noted” that she was not a novice at this type of play or if she’d been referring to the aches and pains of self defense, but he didn’t engage further on the topic.

The app promised discretion, the eyebrow raising membership fee applied toward background, and safety checks, and discretion fees for booking venues. The semi-public setting Rey had chosen didn’t guarantee he wouldn’t take anything extra she didn’t want to offer yet, but this seemed likea compromise. _Compromise for what, Rey? Having a stranger force you... on your terms?_

That voice was common sense, and she left that baggage at Finn and Poe’s.

She could still back out.

_< Ren: I won’t break character to ask for verbal consent. Pls text ‘yes’ five minutes before agreed upon time.>_

A well mannered predator. How... apropos for the types of fantasies she’d scrolled through on the app.

Like a self-sufficient cautious woman should, Rey looked to see if anybody followed before the turned into the alley.

Six minutes.

Hand shaking because for once she felt something other then the nothingness of what Finn termed ennui, she took a long drawn out cleansing breath.

_< Kira: ISO a male partner for forced seduction.>_

She hadn’t had the balls to actually write the word itself. And really, she didn’t want that. Wanting to be taken over, subdued and forced to feel, to be rewarded for a loss....

_< Kira: Tactical experience, preferably grappling/submission holds. Not interested in BDSM, restraints or toys. >_

She had ignored those wanting to chat about kinks. No time to chat with friends much less aroused strangers. No interest either, although technically, she had no interest in anything of late. She ignored those who tried mansplain how she was looking for a Dom.

_< Kylo Ren: I fit your profile. Interested in talking further.>_

Although she raised an eyebrow at the not-subtle reference to the asshole MMA fighter famous for his submission holds, she didn’t question that. If she could be Kira on the app, he could be Ren.

Two weeks later, here she was in an alley in Chandrilla, with nervous fingers tapping out a _yes_.

Okay. _Okay._ No going back now. Well technically she could still go back... to what? Feeling nothing? Starting each day with low grade dread? Poe had already commented how this effected everything she touched, the company, the few friends she had left.

Then again, laying off hundreds, if not, thousands across the globe because of grandfather’s delusions—she hoped he rotted in his grave—didn’t exactly make her CEO of the year.

_Great Rey, make the case for a little rape fantasy to shake you out of depression and be better at your job._

No answering text, although that was to be expected. The exchange previous had been almost as brief.

_< Kylo Ren: Anything else I need to know?>_

_< Kira: I hate my breasts touched.>_

_< Kylo Ren: Noted.>_

No whys. No questions. No telling her how her body should work. Unlike that idiot Ben Solo who kept emailing links to trendy articles on teaching children problem solving because Rey told her niece to clock some little jerk in class.

**_Ms. Palpatine, I understand you grew up in another culture and have an different perspective. Do take time to look through various respected studies on the topic. I hope you’ll agree verbal problem solving skills are consistently more effective then encouraging violence which only perpetuates more of the same._ **

Asshole wrote as if he he were a lit professor instead of a PE teacher at Naboo Middle School.

And thinking of some idiot she hadn’t had the pleasure of telling off in person wasted precious time. If this went well, other encounters, more... intense, could follow. And maybe if she could shock her mind back into feeling, this sensation that nothing mattered would finally let her go and she could focus on her job.

Was she actually doing this?

A quick rub of her middle finger over the ring she had commissioned—the one where a quick flick of her nail would flip open the tiny deadly blade—assured her that she had indeed was here, albeit potentially out of her mind.

_< Ren: What do you like to hear?>_

_< Kira: ??>_

_< Ren: Name calling? Taunting? Degradation?>_

_< Kira: Name calling: not a turn on, but not a hard stop. Taunting/teasing: yes. Degradation: same as above.>_

She could turn. Get out of the alley. Continue living—was this living?—this way, cold, always cold, uninterested, bored. Bringing the downfall of Empire Media she was supposed to be trying to prevent.

_Again with the excuses Rey?_

So she squared her shoulders and stepped out from the comforting beam of the streetlight right into the dark.

_< Kira: What about you?>_

_< Ren: My preferences don’t matter.>_

_< Kira: Any hard nos? I won’t hold back.>_

_< Ren: Feel free.>_

_< Kira: Your safe word? >_

_< Ren: blue balls>_

Maybe he wouldn’t show up.

A slight shiver of disappointment scattered through her, and Rey told herself it was all right, she didn’t really care if he flaked out. She didn’t care about much of anything these days, so what was one more thing?

He didn’t want her, and he hadn’t even met her. Plenty of people didn’t want her who were supposed to keep her safe.

The chills raking her skin were from the cold, because in the interest of time, she had unbuttoned her pea coat. Then again, it could’ve been summer and she would still be cold.

The shadows deepened, tendrils of darkness drawing her inside. The sounds of cars and voices faded, and with them, her resolve. Was she actually going to go through with this?

In college, it was easy. She’d pick the best looking asshole in the bar, then ask him nicely to force her in the bathroom. Sometimes they even made her come, although that had to be enthusiasm rather than skill or planning.

When Finn had found out, he asked her to seek therapy. She’d been too busy scraping by— Granpa hadn’t bothered with her until the cancer diagnosis—she had ignored that.

Now?

She probably needed to reconsider therapy, but with Empire circling the drain, she doubted she could commit the necessary time. For now, she could try her old methods. Even if she seemed to never be warm enough.

As she got deeper in the darkness, she lost Rey. No more the polished business mogul. No more the brilliant strategist, the confident, cool CEO.

She got back to her roots: survival, fighting. And this time, losing would mean pleasure. A win win.

Nothing came at her from the shadows. Nothing breathed fire in the dark. Nothing chased her or haunted—

“Aren’t you a pretty one.”

The voice wasn’t as threatening as it was dangerous: low, gravel velvet ripped with shards of glass. Her heart pounding in her throat, Rey turned, and bumped into a shadow.

No.

A monster.

He must’ve been waiting—that’s all her rational brain could focus on. Surely a man this large, this broad couldn’t move this silent nor this quick. And when she held her ground and raised her fists....

He laughed.

That low dangerous laugh promised.... everything.

“Get out of my way.” Hadn’t she said she didn’t want to play act? Hadn’t she said wanted something with no talk, no script?

She must’ve, because the monster started to advance, forcing her to choose: flee or stand your ground.

She didn’t want to choose. She didn’t want to think. She didn’t want—

Concrete. She was against the concrete now, trapped between his outstretched arms and the rough texture of the wall.

No thinking, then.

She couldn’t see him in the dark, just the outline of of that large frame that would easily hold her down. Some highlights in his hair—was it bound back? His features in the shadows, she could make out a prominent strong nose but couldn’t see his eyes.

“And here I figured you would fight.”

All right then.

A fist into his throat—which he slapped down as if it were an annoyance, a mosquito. Kicks to his chins and ankles had been snuffed as if somehow he had anticipated every move. Attempts to knee him right where it would hurt resulted in a large hand pushing her bent knee toward the wall and twisting her around, leaving her no choice but present him with her unprotected back.

When a large foot kicked both of hers apart, she growled. When a thick arm wrapped around her torso, pushing into her collarbone before sliding to bar across her neck, Rey threw her head back, the part of her remaining normal wondering if she would break his nose.

No contact with his face.

Her blood already heating up, she sent a backwards elbow in his ribs, enough for him to grunt and slam his body forward, trapping her between his thick frame and the wall, the arm across her neck and jaw keeping her face from slamming in the concrete

She tried to kick, to buck him back.

“Good, wiggle that ass,” he whispered in her ear, his fingers brutal on her wrist behind her back. “Show me you want it.”

_This? This is what she wanted?_

The shriek inside her head doesn’t stop her from gasping for breath. It didn’t stop her from getting damp where his rock hard thigh pushed between hers, that large body so hard and hot against her.

She couldn’t control the shiver, didn’t even try. “Get the fuck off me.”

“I think—” Oh fuck, he grazed his teeth over her ear. “—you’ll be the one who’s getting off.”

She bucked again, nearly managed to push him off her. Froze at the very large and very hard erection prodding at her through barrier of clothes. Would he...

The thought filled her with dread. This wasn’t what she wanted. And even as Rey twisted her fingers for her ring, even as blood and arousal and finally, terror, fused inside her, his voice caressed her ear.

“I wouldn’t fuck you even if you begged.”

His way of reassuring her?

She couldn’t stop her own harsh breaths. She couldn’t fight against the hard push of his body, trapped, or rather, contained, subdued and yet not hurt. Warm, despite him tugging her coat open.

“Pretty thing like you need to be taken down a notch.”

She only tired herself fighting, every twist and jerk tightening his hold andhis control.

If she made contact, if bone met bone, he’d grunt then laugh, the dark sound both infuriating and sexy. And damn him, the only pain came from her motions, trying to twist or pull her wrists away, pushing against his thumbs to break his hold, stomping against his shins only to bang her knee into the concrete.

Trapped.

Controlled.

Taken.

“Getting tired, sweet thing?” Teeth scraped over her ear again, and she couldn’t suppress a low embarrassed moan.

She shoved against him one more time and again was met with the hard length of his arousal. And when she threw her head back—at this point on principle because she had no more breath left to fight, he took hold of the hair she helpfully left loose.

“Here’s how this is gonna go.”

She couldn’t find purchase. Couldn’t push back against the wall without pushing into him, against that rock hard cock straining against her buttocks. With her head forced to arch up, her lips, her jaw were bare for him taste, a quick rub of his lips, soft velvet texture, more of an insulting claim of victory then pleasure.

_< Kira: I may consider restraints later, but I’d prefer an active fight.>_

_< Ren: You want to be subdued.>_

_< Kira: ....>_

_< Kira: Yes>_

_< Ren: I understand.>_

Teeth, on her jaw, on the exposed skin of her neck, a scrape, a warning. Rough hands, tugging and shoving fabric down, and Rey slammed her hips into the wall trying to stop the descend..

“What’s this?”

She couldn’t help but keen at the pleasure pain of her panties twisted into a rope and biting right between her folds... right there.

“You’re fucking soaked.”

That cruel laugh danced on her skin with the same rhythm as his fingers, rough, insistent. Sliding so easily against her slick dampened heat. “Pretty little cunts don’t lie.”

He kicked her feet wider this time, giving himself room, availing himself on her body as if somehow it was his to explore, his to touch. His to pleasure.

“Go on now. Tell me you don’t want this. Make this cunt a liar.”

Cruel grip on her hair, teeth on her neck. A rough hand cupping her, not pushing in, but there, a threat of invasion, a warm heat.

“Well?”

All she needed was a little push. Just a slight push of his hand and he would touch her, right there, right where she was a pulsing bundle of arousal.

“Answer me, sweet thing.”

“You’re a dick.”

She had to be sick because she shuddered at that laugh.

“Is that what you want?” Somehow he knew just how to angle her head so he could press his mouth over her fluttering pulse point. Rough hands and gentle lips. “You want something to fuck you?”

“No.”

“Sure?” Teeth on her tendon, and...

God.

There.

_Right there._

Right into her heat, his touch firm and yet gentle, cupping and pressing and...

She couldn’t help but whimper when he took his hand away.

“What’s this?”

She wouldn’t beg. She wouldn’t.

“Please.”

He let go of her hair. Rey could’ve used the opening to snap her head back once again. Except she dropped her forehead on the concrete.

Waited.

Lips on the back of her neck, so soft.

“Don’t-“ She didn’t want soft.

“Beg me to come.”

“You’re fucking crazy.”

_< Ren: How many times?>_

_< Kira: ??>_

_< Ren: How many times do you want to come?>_

_< Kira: Once. Too sensitive after.>_

_< Ren: understood>_

A rough caress this time. She didn’t realize she was all but held in a strong embrace, a thick arm wrapped around her torso holding her in place.

“I’m fucking crazy?”

And a rough slide against her clitoris had her knees buckling, her weight going slack agains his hold.

That laughter.

God, that laugh alone could make her come.

“You’re the one,” he grunted when she tried to buck again, but really, it was only for principle, and really, it was only to get him to punish her by moving his hand faster, “who’s sopping wet having some fucktard touch your pussy.”

“I’m not wet.”

“You’re a fucking liar.”

And he made sure she knew that too, because despite her trying to close her thighs to keep his hand where it was, he brought his fingers to his lips.

“Filthy little liar,” he said and thought she couldn’t see, she heard his suck his digits clean. “Good thing you taste so fucking sweet.”

She had to use the opportunity. She simply had to. Her heartbeat pounding in her throat, Rey shoved an elbow back, caught him off guard enough for that iron grip to loosen.

Then she was free, running, having taken several steps when once again she was caught, shoved into a wall, this time with her back into the concrete, this time with enough force for air to leave her lungs.

A heart beat.

Three.

Did he wait for her to get her breath back?

“Where you think you’re going?” Hand on her throat, another holding both wrists up, his paw so large he held her with no effort. “You aren’t done.”

Lips on her lips.

Soft, surprisingly soft. For a moment, she forgot. For a moment she simply tasted, reveled in the texture. For a moment, he softened.

But no, this wasn’t real, this was her fantasy, and even as she tensed again, that cruel grip bit into both wrists, the hand on her throat gone so he could push under her clothing.

“Filthy little liar,” he murmured right against her mouth and Rey caught herself at this idiotic urge to chase him, claim those ridiculous soft lips. “Good thing you taste so sweet.”

A rock hard thigh shoved between her trembling legs, keeping her spread, anchored. And even as she tried to pry her lids open to see him in the dark, those tantalizing fingers slid over her folds.

“That’s it,” he whispered right against her mouth. “Fight it. Fight not to come.” She couldn’t help but keen, couldn’t help but shudder. The thigh between her legs no longer kept her captive, but rather kept her upright, kept her still. “You don’t want this, remember?” Teeth on her neck, then suckling pressure right under her ear. “You don’t want to come.” A dark chuckle. “Do you.”

“No.”

“What’s that?”

Harder.

Faster.

Sparks became fire, a molten swirl of arousal and need. No more hands on her wrists, she could’ve easily struck him. Except he held her by neck, a gentle hold as if cupping, cradling her entire body, lips rubbing over hers between low filthy words.

“Don’t come, little liar.” Faster, rougher tempo.

Rey chased his mouth. Felt that triumphant grin as she found his lips, long fingers on her jaw, cradling her, controlling.

Rough speed, slick heat, circling, rubbing, moving, and even as she threw her head back, even as she drew herself up tight, her muscles seizing, hands fisting on those massive shoulders, he didn’t slow.

“That’s it little liar.” The whispered words against her lips tightened the coils of blistering hot need. “Fight it. Fight not to come right on my hand.” Faster now, those lips caressing the corners of her mouth, so soft, in complete contrast of the now rough hard tempo. “Fight me.”

She couldn’t. Instead she let the heat roll over her, the white hot lavaof release and pleasure spiraling from where he touched her up through her her veins. Blind, her breath trapped, she opened her mouth to scream but no sound came out. She simply shook, helpless in his arms, pushing into his touch for more, more, there, right there, open, helpless, contained.

Free to completely shatter.

Time?

Lost.

All she heard were breaths, hers or his, Rey wasn’t certain. All she could feel was pressure—not movements, not anymore because anything would be too much, but presssure? Nonverbal reassurance that this happened. That he was there.

That he had her, held her.

In that strong hold, she tried to catch her breath, she couldn’t help but lay her forehead on his shoulder.

Hard shoulder.

Strong, strong arms.

Silence, in the dark.

“Thank you.”

Was that her voice that shook?

Fuck. Tears. Pinpricks of them already stung her lids.

“I need to go.”

For a quick second those arms tightened around her, and maybe, a part of her wanted him to keep her there. Keep her.

But then the breeze whipped past and he no longer held her captive, although his large frame still pressed against hers, his lips inches from her hair.

_< Ren: What do you need for after?>_

_< Kira: Nothing.>_

“May I hold you?”

“No.”

She needed to get out. She needed to run, to flee, to break down in private. Let the catharthis, the whole fucking point of this take her over and maybe, finally, shock her into feeling something.

She didn’t have a name for what she felt.

“I’ll watch you till you get into your car”

If she opened her mouth to argue, she would cry. So Rey nodded instead. With her back to him, he wouldn’t see the tears falling.

Freezing.

The wind tore at her skin, whipped under the layers of her clothing. She let the tears come freely as soon as she cleared the alley, knowing his eyes remained on her.

She only needed to hold on a little while longer. And even as Rey walked toward her car, she thought of the other post she had initially scrolled over, and, couldn’t help but scoff.

<Matt: ISO female partner for skin to skin connection/embrace. Sex optional. Four-six hours so I can sleep.>

She looked back once she neared her car, the Lexus automatically starting the heater. Without seeing him, she let herself wipe away tears, allowed herself to slump down in the seat.

Let go.

She smelled him on her skin, faint trace of aftershave and something musky and let the tears fall free. No sobs, no gut wrenching emotion. She thought maybe she’d wail when his arms tightened around her, but that wasn’t the case.

In silence, in the not-quite-there-warmth, Rey ignored the hundreds of notifications of server interruptions, similar number of “urgent” emails that no doubt came up, and tried to figure out why exactly she was crying.

She still felt nothing. Or maybe that had been the point, because despite the moisture on her face, this numbness was still there.

Except that post from “Matt” kept popping in her mind. Despite the promise to herself that after this foolishness she would dive into the work, Rey opened up the app.

It had been made several months ago, but since there hadn’t been as much activity in the sex-optional thread, she didn’t to scroll too far to find it.

Maybe...

_< Sunny: I saw your post. Would like to discussfurther.>_


End file.
